Community vs equitable states, separate-property rules, and the house/pension traps
| Stays separate (not divided) | Unless… |
|---|
Divorce divides the marital estate — everything either spouse acquired during the marriage, regardless of whose name is on it — after fencing off separate property (pre-marriage assets, inheritances, gifts). Nine community-property states split marital 50/50 by rule; the other 41 divide "equitably," which clusters at 50/50 anyway with tilts for documented factors. The math is simple; the money is lost in three places this estimator makes visible: the house's liquidity trap, the retirement plan's tax and QDRO trap, and commingling.
| Asset | Character | The wrinkle |
|---|---|---|
| Salary, bonuses, 401(k) contributions during marriage | Marital | Regardless of title or account name |
| Pre-marriage assets | Separate | But marital-era GROWTH and paydown create marital claims — the wedding-date statement is the key document |
| Inheritance to one spouse | Separate | Until deposited in the joint account — commingling converts it, and it happens constantly |
| The business one spouse built | Marital (the marital-era value growth) | Valuation wars; the non-owner spouse gets bought out, not partnered |
Almost never for marital-era acquisitions — title doesn't control character. The paycheck deposited to 'your' account during the marriage is marital everywhere. Title matters at the margins: retitling separate property jointly usually GIFTS it to the marriage.
Half the MARITAL portion — contributions and growth during the marriage. The pre-wedding balance plus its growth stays yours if you can document it (grab the wedding-month statement NOW). Split via QDRO to avoid taxes and penalties.
Whoever can refinance it alone and wants the illiquid half. The three outcomes: sell and split (cleanest), buyout with refinance (keeper compensates via other assets), or deferred sale (co-owning with your ex — kids' stability sometimes justifies it; nothing else does).
Marital funds spent on non-marital purposes as the marriage failed — affairs, gambling, secret transfers, spite spending. Courts add proven dissipation back to the dissipator's column. Bank statements are the case; start collecting them early.
Marital debts (incurred during, for marital purposes), yes — but CREDITORS aren't bound by your decree: a joint card assigned to your ex still shows on your credit and they can pursue you. Close/refinance joint debts at settlement; never leave your name on their obligation.
Amicable couples with simple estates can mediate cheaply — but have separate attorneys REVIEW before signing, and never skip the QDRO or the refinance requirement. The expensive divorces are the ones that economized on the paperwork that turned out to be the whole game.
Yes — every figure computes locally in your browser and is never transmitted.
Fence the separate property, after-tax every number, refinance or sell the house, and file the QDRO before the ink dries. The division is arithmetic — the losses are all in the asset characters people didn't compare.